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Wednesday, May 4, 2011

The Chosen Ones

You know how they say God doesn't give you more than you can handle? Well, can you please tell God I think I have reached my limit!!!!
 Yesterday I received an very, nasty email from my 27 yr old son Scott, saying we have reached the end of the road, and how awful of a mother I was and so on. I am not w/o fault, never claimed to be, but, this entire mess is all because I wanted the family at Jennifer's sweet 16 party, Megan & Scott have ALWAYS been jealous of Jennifer & Daniel, because they have chosen different paths for their lives, they have focused on moving on from what ever situation life has dealt them. 
 Last year Terry and I were separated, he is an alcoholic, well we reconciled 6 mos later and he became sober on Jenn's birthday & just celebrated his 1 year on April 29, when we were separated, it was hard on Jenn, and she made some mistakes, she owned up to them, but, her sister has not let her forget them, which of us as teenagers haven't made some wrong choices? I am the first one to raise my hand! And Megan has made some of the WORST choices.
 I am proud of Jennifer, she is in a scholarship program, where is she completes her HS years in honor roll she will get a state school scholarship, and she wants to go to Northern AZ University, and we just found out starting this coming school year, her JR & SR year she will go to HS in the morning & Community College in the afternoon, so when she graduates HS, she will also graduate as a sophomore in COllege, and for some reason Megan & Scott can't handle that and instead of being supportive they trashed her from here to SUnday, and days later Megan decided to go back to school in the fall, well I was thrilled for her, not angry??? I don't understand the logic!
 Daniel, who is 29, is completely out of the fold he is a grown man, with his own life, as it should be, he chose a long time ago not to deal with his dad, Scott & Megan because of this very reason.
 Daniel & Jennifer, are labeled the chosen ones, but, the ex & 2 other kids, no, they just handle things differently, Daniel was car jacked at gun point, and had to jump out of a moving car on a free way to escape, the police said had he not done that, he probably would have lost his life, it was a terrible experience he went through, but, he dealt with it, went & back to work, he never ONCE heard from his father or siblings, and it was on the news, and I made sure they knew about it.I was so proud of him then, and the thought of losing him had me totally shook up.When Daniel was little, he & I were very close, we did so much together, he was the first, and I know that is typical, but, he has a similar personality as I do, so that crossed him off his dad's list right there.I am proud of Daniel & Jessica, they have both had to over come some difficult things in their lives, and they have prevailed!
 Shortly after the car jacking, his girl friend of 3 years broke up with him, that was hard on top of that, little did we know that would be a blessing, because he never would have met Jessica, she is great for him, they compliment each other well, and she knows exactly what she is getting into.
 Daniel has alway enjoyed sports, & grew up to be a sports writer, and we are very proud of him, Daniel & Jennifer choose to move forward and not wallow in their crap.
 I have woken up to a mean email everyday this week, and I assure you I haven't responded to one, I was told to dis own the grand kids, by Megan, and she disowned me, well as heart breaking as it is, I haven't seen these babies in 2 years, so what I w as asking to do, was no different than the way things already are. Then on 3 occasions I was ordered to stop blogging, I have been blogging since early fall so, I have no intentions on stopping unless, those of you who are reading them tell me to stop.
 And then I was ordered by the ex to keep Megan & Scottie out of my life, Scott has been back 5 weeks, & I have seen him 20 min, one of those times, I invited him for Easter & he yelled at me, saying "the Family" is doing something, I have repeatedly asked him to get together, he speaks to me very disrespectfully, he has been living with his dad 9 years, and those of you that know them both, will see he treats me just as his dad did/....After talking with my hubby, we decided our family is thriving right now, and as hard as it will be, we should probably comply to their request, because the daily nasty emails, and the talking disrespectfully & more, is not good for our nuclear family right now. It is hurtful, & Killing me..........., what they don't realize is I do have a heart, I am a woman who gave birth to 5 children, and love each one equally, they are just different people, there isn't anything I wouldn't do for them, they are my heart, and when they are not part of my life, it is like a part of my heart is not working. I did not raise them like this, & I do hate to keep going back to the ex, but, this behavior is all coming from his parenting. What kind of man or adult children, pick on a women and try & push her to her limit when she just had a stroke, & because of my diabetes, I am susceptible to having another stroke.
 I will tell you what kind of person, a man who battered his wife, that would be me for 11 years. I finally said it, never thought I would, especially on FB, but, if he can still be verbally & mentally abusing me 19 years AFTER our divorce, God knows what a man like this can do, so PLEASE if you are being battered in any way, contact me, & get help, it doesn't go away!!!

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